Thoughts on the Beat

"So in America when the sun goes down and I sit on the old broken-down river pier watching the long, long skies over New Jersey and sense all that raw land that rolls in one unbelievable huge bulge over to the West Coast, and all that road going, and all the people dreaming in the immensity of it, and in Iowa I know by now the children must be crying in the land where they let the children cry, and tonight the stars’ll be out, and don’t you know that God is Pooh Bear? The evening star must be drooping and shedding her sparkler dims on the prairie, which is just before the coming of complete night that blesses the earth, darkens all the rivers, cups the peaks and folds the final shore in, and nobody, nobody knows what’s going to happen to anybody besides the forlorn rags of growing old, I think of Dean Moriarty, I even think of Old Dean Moriarty the father we never found, I think of Dean Moriarty." Excerpt from Jack Kerouac's "On the Road"

Since I was seventeen years old, Jack Kerouac is someone I try to read little taste of every year. First discovering William S. Burroughs, I dug deeper into what's coined as the "Beat Generation" and found the 1950's intersection of jazz and literature. This movement of a postwar subculture is the ember glow of coals which were later stoked by the Vietnam war and the mournful, yet fortunate, backlash of the baby boomer generation.

America's history is what you chose to acknowledge and which glasses you want to place in front of your eyes. Hindsight truly is 20-20. Connections and interrelations of interceptions prove to be obvious when you get about 50 to 60 years away. The depression of the 1930's was abruptly diverted when in 1941 America picked up her gun and responded to the provocation by Japan. War has a way of escalating. In 1945 the war escalated to a point that left the delivery men wrapped with an undercurrent of guilt. Happy no longer a nation at war, we eventually come to terms in our own way with the violence both demonstrated and observed during the first half of the 1940's.

The 1950's couldn't have been more perfect and squeaky clean for the boomers whose parents wanted nothing but to wash out the sins of the world. On the surface, this was the best time for a child to grow up. Certain surfaces have a way of wearing out if you constantly polish with an abrasive agent. Children tend to notice and acknowledge things adults often want to ignore.

The 1950's brought us the start of the pharmacology revolution, enabling us to live better through chemistry. The 1950's brought us pills that delivered us from anxiety and depression. All across America, from Vermont to Iowa to Oregon, mother's little helper was stashed away in medicine cabinets. The need for a pill to take it away was just what the doctor ordered. We so badly needed that white picket fence and love of the American Dream.

Jack Kerouac took a poetic stab at it. All the people tucked in and dreaming under the evening star. His line, "don’t you know that God is Pooh Bear?" resonates to a deeper statement hinting towards our need for something bigger than ourselves to keep us comfortable and content. Everything is going to be alright and we will have a place in eternity. There is an eternity, right? Boy, we sure hope so. Be carefree and joyous while we play and overindulge from the honey pot. Don't worry because America will prevail and be prosperous. After all, even if it's Pooh Bear, "In God We Trust" is our official motto.

It's the 58% that matters

June is the month where our schedules are consumed with a vast array of social obligations. We run from graduation party to graduation party. We eat wedding cake. We grill hot dogs with friends and family. We complain about how busy we are, yet revel in the fact that we are loved enough to be overbooked and overextended.

Last night, the realization of 2009 being halfway through sunk in. This, my thirtieth year on this planet, is already fifty percent complete. This morning I sat down with a cup of coffee in hand to take inventory of my accomplishments over the past six months only to reach the conclusion that I work too much. Too much of my precious 24 hours is spent either working, thinking about work, or talking about work.

Today, this fourteenth of June, I will take a mid years resolution and make the commitment to pick up the mindset of where I left off some years ago before all the duties and habits of hard work consumed me. While I do love my job and take a personal responsibility to better the lives of people who work with me, I need to draw a line in the sand and prioritize. Work should not follow me home at night and whisper concerns into my ears.

Each day has 24 hours. Each week has 168 hours. A year has roughly 8,760 hours. Annually, I should spend 2,080+ hours working. That's it, just 8 hours per day or 40 hours per week. In statistical speak, 24% of my life should be allocated to my career, 34% allocated to sleeping, and the remaining 58% for me to do with as I feel obligated to. It's the 58% that matters and I am looking forward to seizing it.

Me and Rocky

The other afternoon, while I was out watering flowers, I heard this scared critter crying. It turns out he/she was trapped in between the the platform of my neighbor's shed and my fence, and could not get back under the shed to mom. I ran over to the little critter and gave him a little pet, he immediately began to make the cutest cooing sound. The siblings were under the shed nursing from mom when I picked up the guy so he could safely get back to mom. Yes, I know raccoons are nasty disease carrying critters with opposable thumbs who want nothing more than to break into your garbage. But nature has this way of making babies adorable so you don't have the heart to hurt them.

Christmas Rules

"One of the amendments to the Constitution... expressly declares that 'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press,' thereby guarding in the same sentence and under the same words, the freedom of religion, of speech, and of the press; insomuch that whatever violates either throws down the sanctuary which covers the others."
— Thomas Jefferson

Just as Christmas parties evolved into holiday parties, holiday parties are now evolving into "annual winter celebrations". I was a little discouraged by the recent invite I received stating just this: Annual Winter Celebration. Are you f*cking my leg here, or did I really just receive an invite to something actually titled "Annual Winter Celebration". Last year it was titled "Holiday Party", and a few years prior it was called a "Christmas Party". Being analytically caffeinated as I sometimes am, I began to try to look deeper into this.

Religious freedom is one of the most basic fundamental rights humans have. Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Atheist, Agnostic, Hindu, and so on are all entitled to coexist in America. Really, this should be expanded globally, but I'm just going to focus on the good ol' United States for now. Here comes my ramblings from what's on my mind:

Early on in the holiday season, the U..S Marine Corps Reserve Toys for Tots Program refused to accept donations of talking Jesus dolls from the company one2believe. They were concerned of offending a Jewish or Muslim recipient. Ok, I may understand if a company was trying to donate little Hitler dolls, there might be room for concern. But how is Jesus offensive? Toys for Tots requires that gifts are left unwrapped so that families and children may decline certain gifts, which then are gifted to other children. After much public outrage, the Corps has since reversed their decision, and are accepting the Jesus Dolls.

I do understand the backlash against Christianity. "Whereas Christianity was once synonymous with charity, compassion and love for one’s neighbor, today it is more often equated with partisan politics, anti-homosexual rhetoric and affluent mega-churches. But unlike many Christians today, Christ did not engage in politics, identify with the government or attempt to push an agenda through governmental channels. Indeed, Christ spoke truth to power and made it abundantly clear that his kingdom was not of this world." (John W. Whitehead) Greed, power, selfishness, and money are essentially raping Christianity (and other religions) on some levels. The charity, compassion, love for one's neighbor do most certainly exist, but are at times a bit overshadowed by the negative side of it.

Several weeks ago as I was driving into work, I noticed something which made me laugh out-loud. A Buick a few lanes over inadvertently cut off a Honda CRV. It was not by any means accident causing, just a little absentmindedness on the driver of the Buick. Instead of the Honda driver accepting he was cutoff, and just letting it go, he had express his frustration to the Buick driver. So Mr. Honda pulled up alongside Mr Buick, and proceeded to honk his horn, raise his middle finger, shake in anger, and scream at him. This went on for approximately 1/2 a mile, when I recognized the Honda driver as a parishioner at my church. Even better, he had the mantra of Jesus stickers on the CRV's bumper. So yeah, I see the hypocrisy all the time, both in myself and in others.

Elementary school for me was not that long ago; I attended public k-5 from 1984 until 1989. I loved the Christmas concerts we presented for our parents and families. Ranging from Santa to Jesus, we covered all the classics. It's sad to know that only a decade and a few years into the future, such concerts don't exist as widely as they once did. Just as courthouses and other government buildings get in trouble for Christmas decorations, so do public schools for pledging allegiance.

I think we are misconstruing the idea of freedom of religion to freedom from religion. We as role-models to our children need to realize every action we take, every comment we make, are being absorbed by the eyes of our future leaders. Why not embrace all people and their diversity? Remember, Jesus ran with a pretty tough bunch, but he loved them all. His main message was to love thy neighbor as thyself. We don't have to bash Christianity to protect other religions; I think all religions have the ability to play nice in the sandbox. If everybody tried to understand and accept how wonderfully similarly different we all are, maybe we really could end poverty, wage peace, and protect each other and the planet we live on.

Masterbating Cat

This past winter I walked in on something I'd rather forget happened. Oscar, our orange and white cat, was rubbing himself all over my fleece blanket. At first, I did not know what exactly was going on. The second he started to quiver, I abruptly took my blanket away from him and threw it into the washing machine. An acquaintance of mine is an animal behaviorist, so I casually brought the topic up to him in hopes that he would not confirm my fear. But he did indeed confirm it by saying "oh yeah, your cat is TOTALLY a masturbator !". Shocked, I asked him why this would happen because Oscar is fixed. I guess fixed or not fixed, some animals just like to do it because it feels good.

Months go by without either my husband or I witnessing Oscar pleasuring himself. Then, last Saturday, I woke up to the most blatant episode of cat self-love. Normally, I would have laughed and walked away, but not that day. Why? Because he was on top of me doing it! I screamed and jumped out of the bed. Oscar just looked at me like I ruined a good moment for him. My cat likes me too much, I'm freaked out.